Self-Image

An Open Letter to My Daughters…

As your mother, I worry.

I grew up in a much different world than you will, one that allowed privacy and encouraged imagination.

You will be inundated by overstimulation, and at times, intruding transparency.

My childhood was riddled with wardrobe faux pas and cosmetic malfunctions, that thankfully never saw the light of day.  You, on the other hand, will have access to editing and filters that will disillusion your self-image and derange your definition of beauty.

And as your mother, I worry.

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When I was growing up, I didn’t know what people thought about me unless they said it to my face.

You are being raised in a society that defines likability with social analytics and the sentiments of online trolls who find courage behind a digital curtain.

And as your mother, I worry.

Underneath the high expectations of a digital world I want you to be able to see the truth through all the facades.

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I loved you before I knew the color of your hair or the length of your eyelashes.

I was rooting for you before you took your first step.

I have respected you since you uttered your first “No”.

Remember this, because this is what unconditional love is.  There were no filters that made me feel this way about you.  No price, no limitation.

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Long before #metoo – daughters were conditioned to accept less, inundated with belittling mantras like “boys who call you names, do it because they like you.”

Find the ones that don’t use demeaning tactics to gain your affection.

Please don’t accept less.

For now, you reside under my protective wing.  I have control over the direction of your life, but it won’t be long and this season will pass.

I will have to let you go.

And as your Mother, I will worry.

So, remember this –  strong women have brave ideas and purpose is not fulfilled while hiding behind filters.

You are not the words that others use to define you.

When you can, break the mold.

Seek unconditional love and create a life that makes you want to pinch yourself because this is what dreams are made of.

And as your mother, I will try not to worry…

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